Must be nice

to have a day off so to speak and hide away from the wife and kids!

He truly does not understand that I too would/need a break and not just to go upstairs and put laundry away...I need out I need a me time. My hormones are all messed up right now I cry at the drop of a pin or just plain moody and well then he gets all mad and ignores me which in turn the kids too. Do I have to keep asking for help or a break? It is tiring especially when It still does not happen for me... are men just that dense to it all?

well that is it my pity party is over. I'll suck it up and go on as I normally do.

Well now

It has been a few days since I last posted here, to many computer stuff I tell ya...between Facebook and a few other message board I belong to one always seem to fall behind....and why is facebook so addicting?

Anyways.......

My Ri guy is now 2yrs old he is not so much a baby anymore. We did not have a big party just some family came over and had cake...Oh guess the cake was for me too since I am a yr older now ..lol

My pg s going well I feel ill and oh so tired with this one I can not seem to get anything done around here...I am slacking big time.

I am trying to go through my photo of 2008 so I can make a photo book man I took a lot of photos. Then I can not decide which photos to put on my photo wall I have (It is 12x12 frame I have 9 of them, 3 down and 3 across)

I have not really touched my camera much lately just feeling tire and blah and this weather sucks I am so tired of the snow does it not know it is SPRING now!

How sweet it is

heard a little thump thump thump on my Doppler last night.... what a sweet sound.

ABC

Today I thought about ABC with Lil O and when I sang out ABCD...(I paused) and he sang the rest my jaw hit the floor.......when did he learn this????

U/S went great

9w2d

baby is doing well measures 9w2d ( I wrote the wrong weeks last post so I changed it)



I had to take the boys with me and they made me so proud. Ri started to cry a little when the u/s tech put the probe on my belly but settled pretty quick, lil O just stood at the end of the table and watched never made a peep.

Had to go to the fertility clinic right after (just down the hall) and again they were really good in the waiting area. As the nurse called my name another patient said my name and I paused and looked at her she said her name the then place we worked at together, I then remembered her and sad that she was still having a hard time ttc...I told her not to loose hope.. she said yes I see that and looked at my boys.
While waiting for the Dr to come in Lil O asked what the funny looking table was that had things sticking out of it (the stirups on the table) I said that is where some get a check up. Then Dr W walked in and Lil O looked at him and said "I don't want a check up" I lol and said no this is mummys check up the table is not needed today. Dr W chuckled.

My next u/s is the the nuchal translucency on Apr 8.

After wards I took the boys to a play area since they were so good.

What can I say

I am so flipping tired, this pg has me so drained....and to eat that is a chore but I get food down.

I am about 9w2d today go for another u/s on Wed to see how the weeOne is doing. I still am amazed that I am pg, I can not get over it and then I start thinking wow 3 kids wow..lol. I am still very nervous too I am waiting for something to happen something always happens so what is it going to be this time....I am just waiting.......

in other news we got a contracter in to do out basement (a little over half is on barter) they started on Dec 10th, what is all to be done is:
Paint the main area and trim put up the drop celine.
Drywall the spare bedroom/office, paint , trim and drop celing.
put in a 3 peice bathroom

well today is March 9 and the painting was done in the 1st 2wks, painter and contracter are 2 different guys (painter gets the job done when he said he would)
the other guy well not sure about him..lol. He 1st said that it would all be done at the end of Jan (even signed a contract with dh) well that came and went then he asked if it could be extended till end of Feb.....see where I am going...end of Feb came and went and he is not done has not even said anything. He had his trailer of tools parked on our drive way for the longest time, I have often wandered what he was doing if his trailer is here and he is working else where (unless he has more trailers) He has not showed up today yet was not here Friday. The job is slowly getting done slowly and all I can say is I hope it is done by the time the weather is nice, so we can use the basement. As for reference he won't be getting one from us...just too many ecusses and does not show up when he says he will be here.

bathroom area before:


bathroom area today:


main area before:


Main area today:

Had u/s

On Wednesday and we are measuring 7w4d hb 147




I get there 10min late (could not find a parking space) and they have me sit for almost another 10 and then they inform me that they want to go for lunch can I come back at one....WHAT! Why could they not say this when I walked in ant 2 I have to now see if it is ok with the fertility clinic (they are down the hall) if I come at one now, since I am to see then right after the u/s.
Clinic was fine but I did say the the u/s place everyone here takes there lunch at the same time? I was not a happy camper lets say. Good thing a mall is near buy. I went and bought Lil O some swim trunks and found distilled water for the steam mop I just bought.

whoot whoot

**** We have a baby in the uterus with a wonderful heart beating away.

Still not really out of the woods but so far all looks great, I have to go back for another u/s to determine how far along I really am but the Dr is thinking around 7wks...I am really pg... seeing that heart beating just had me in awe.

When the Dr Scott walked in she looked at me and said "You sure like to deify all odds don't you...lol"


I went to the clinic for 1:10pm and did not see her till 2pm I was to be at the hospital for 2pm. Got to the Hosp at 2:45 and my IVIG was not ready...oh what a surprise... so finally was hooked and and running at 3:30pm done at 5:30.


What a day!

Got the call from the Clinic

Nurse Amanda said they received my 1st numbers and they are at 16,000 so somewhere between 6 and 8weeks...(I am thinking 6weeks) I go in to the clinic for a quick u/s just so they can make sure of the measurements and that baby is where is should be and hopefully see a heart beat.

I had to tell mum yesterday because she called and asked if she could get rid of that highchair since Ri sits nicely now, I was like umm ah well...I did not want to say anything just yet but you may want to keep it for a bit longer...apparently I am pg, we are just waiting on my beta #'s. I told her not to say a word to anyone.

I called mum this morning to see if she a papaBear could watch the boys tomorrow while I go to the clinic and then to my IVIG, she said she had to tell PapaBear I said well I ecpected that..lol she said he got all teary eyed.

I feel nauseaus this morning

BLahhhhh

I feel ill.....but that is a good thing I take it.. :)

Went for my 1st beta blood draw go again tomorrow since I could not go today, Family Day and all. I have avoided talking with family...lol

I am still shocked, I am afraid to believe it

Man I thought I'd play cool

with this one but Nooooooo....the obsessing has started, Doing the TP check and I wonder about every little twitch or pain I get now, I also find myself poking at my breast so see if the are getting sore....umm yeah that will do it.....And man do I hate to sneeze!

Oops loosing it already....

I forgot to mention that when I put the boys down for there nap I normally put Lil O's diaper back on (he only has it on when he sleeps) well being so preoccupied I forgot... well he slept 2hrs without incident, he woke calling out to me that he went in his pants. I went in to get him and he would not walk, he was walking bull legged, I asked what he was doing he said he went in his pants (I am thinking yeah so why walk funny) then it dawned on me he did not have a diaper on so I felt his butt if there was bulk nope none just his boxers...then I heard him say oh poop poo so I hurried him to the potty he was all upset that he started to go in his pants I said it is ok I am sorry momma forgot his response "yeah mommy bad you forgot"... it all went where is was to go...in the potty.

I am so proud of my boy.

He is also really starting to use his imagination a lot, today he was stomping around and he announced that he was a giant as he stomped and marched around repeating I am a giant, here I come......

Poking starts tomorrow.

The nurse called me back from the fertility clinic and said to start my beta test on Saturday and then Tuesday (since Monday is a Holiday) a little longer then the 48hrs they like but it will still let them see if my levels are rising. Also IVIG will start next week, good thing I have a few books I need to read. Depending on my #'s it will decide if I need an u/s sooner then later, since I don't have a clue as to how far along I am...Last af was Dec 19.

The nurse laughed when I told her that I figured I should call them after the 4th test. She said it makes her smile when she is told this, since the 1st one already says you pg...lol so from the looks of it I could have a new one in my arms between Sept to Nov sometime if I go full term or not and if everything go well...

I still can not believe it. Dh bets on how long I can keep it a secret I said till at least after my 1st appointment.

---

I told dh

and asked him to bring home another test...lol...(yes I need to POAS a few times) This mornings was a little darker....why can I not still believe this.

When I mentioned it to dh he got a little excited and said oh so a girl could be in our future?

---

Here is proof my boys do love each other...they make my heart swell


Good think Lil O was wearing the helmet for fun because after I took this shot they tripped and he fell and hit the stove with his head...helmet worked..lol

still hmmmm

Well took another pg test and it was BFP
dare I post a photo of this.
Cyber world is the 1st to know....I have not told hubby nor my family yet, don't want to get them all excited if it turns out to be nothing. Just when I was getting use to the idea of being told I had a slim to nill chance of having another baby this happens.

Hmmm

Can pre-menopause cause a false positive? I am going to take another test in the morning see what I get, I am so dang confused right now.

I am going crazy

or at least I feel like it...

this so called pre-menopause is kicking my butt.

I feel so emotional, my temper is quick then I feel like crying and then I am fine.... I am so hot I want to rip my clothes off then the next minute I have the chills....I don't feel like BD'ing at all let alone touching me (I know he does not understand, he thinks pms is not real....I have/had bad pms too) Af is late 3wks so a part of me wonders is this pms but then I get the hotflashes. I want a hug but then if I get it I know I will start to cry, on top off all that my pap was abnormal so I now have to wait (and dh is worried about it) I seem to have an ache/pain all the time, when one goes another comes....... I just feel like I can't win at the moment

there got it out...

Ahh

Sure do not get much done when the kids are sick and the weather not so great.... Glad to say the kids are better and the weather is refreshing.... we went and played outside in the snow yesterday. My oldest had fun the youngest he still was not so sure of the white cold wet stuff.




---

Last night as Lil O was eating supper he was flipping through the paper and I said to him O finish up your supper please. His response " I'm trying to read the page mom..."

I need out....

2weeks straight at home...oye.

2 sick kids one right after the other....we need out....

Ri is better now Lil O is on the mend pretty much there, if not tomorrow we will get out on Wed...I hope.

They sure are too very different sick kids.

-----

I just finished reading Marley and Me it was not to bad did get a couple chuckles out of it and I did cry at the end. It took a few chapters for me to get into it though.

Appointment made...and other stuff

On May 6th I go for the colposcopy, now we wait.

For some strange reason I was thinking yesterday was Tuesday man thoses kind of days mess you up...lol

Ri has not being feeling well he was throwing up then it started to come out of the bottom ... what a mess. But I will say I think I prefer it coming from the bottom, yes it is mess and a stinky gaggy mess but yet it is more controlled then it coming out of the mouth....I still gag with that to.

Lil O is doing awesome with the potty even went #2 yesterday in it, scared him but he did it no less (potty training is not as bad as I 1st thought it would be)